WHEN IT'S HARD TO BE A GRANNIE.
When my first grandson was born we were overjoyed. Two days later we found he had cancer. My daughter, unmarried, lived with us and her partner left three months later. I gave up my job and for a year I went to the hospital with my daughter to help her. News was sometimes good and sometimes bad but the hospital were hopeful he would survive. But at one year old he relapsed and we brought him home for his first birthday and he died 12 days later. I tried split myself in two to look after my husband and to look after my daughter and grandson. When there was no hope half of you wants it to end because of the suffering and half of you hopes a miracle will happen. We survived. Then two years later my son and daughter-in-law had a little girl, she was beautiful like my grandson, but there was something wrong. She had Edwards syndrome, which means severe brain damage, I thought we can not go through this again but we did. She died at three and a half months. Through all this people would say "you must think there is no God", and although I am not a regular churchgoer I do not think God was any part of it. One person who help us through was the vicar; always there - although I can not explain why he pulled us through. I have now two more grandsons and a lovely grand-daughter, it is very difficult not to spoil them, and very hard to see them being punished for anything, because I think what they do can not be as bad as what has happened to us. But there is light at the end of the tunnel, the grief was sometimes unbearable but it does get better but you never forget. I went through a few months of not being able to do anything of value, but knew I had to pull myself together.
Rev Ray and Brenda know who I am, if anyone needs any help with something similar I will help if I can.
God bless
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