GRANNIES GALORE


Wonderful, keeps you young’   Sue Edgar

The most wonderful feeling’ Pat Nicole

‘Wonderful – if you’ve got the energy’ Maggie Higgins

‘Wonderful, with much joy and many tears’ Brenda Eveleigh

 

In these soundings, taken from a number of Grannies in the UK, the word ‘Wonderful’ is used almost to the exclusion of any other adjective – and this seems to me to be a paradox!   Yes, it is wonderful (I have 3 grandsons and 1 granddaughter) but let’s be honest about it, there can another side – one which can niggle away leaving Granny with a feeling of guilt or neglect.  

    William, Jake & Grannie

                       

With her own children grown-up, many of today’s Grannies continue with their career,   develop a new direction, feel free to pursue their own inclinations    … but wait a minute – if her own children live nearby it is often assumed that Granny will be an unpaid childminder whilst the parents continue with their careers…. What then?     Has Granny any choice in the matter?   If she says ‘no’ she risks spoiling family relationships – if she says ‘yes’ she is obliged to put her own life on hold; and anyway, part of her wants to say ‘yes’ from a deep natural desire.

Georgina, Grannie & Daniel

                        That deep natural desire can be starved if grandchildren live several thousand miles away and are seen only rarely.  Visits are expensive and usually extend to a couple or three weeks.   Arrival is akin to Christmas Morning - departure is an agony of separation and the period in between flies with the speed of dew before the morning sunshine.   The time together is both precious and priceless but has also the feeling of being unreal:  is the visit the ‘real time’ in our life or does the ‘real time’ start again when we get home?   I have been very fortunate where my 16 year old grandson, William, is concerned.  I live in the UK, he lives in the USA and I’ve probably seen more of him than if he had lived, say, in Aberdeen!   One of my bitter-sweet memories, when he was just 3, was in talking to him on the phone.    It broke my heart to hear him wistfully ask ‘When are you coming ober, Granny?’  His toddler way of saying ‘over’ really started the tears flowing freely – and he had no idea of what ‘coming over’ meant or the distance and expense involved.

 

                        There are various permutations of ‘Grannyhood’, to coin a word!

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